Tuesday 18 May 2010

The Final Countdown

Well, dear reader, after 8 months, your correspondent has decided to take up the keyboard of doo-laden philosophy once again. However, I fear this may be the last time I raise my quill, (it’s a kind of pen, Tony), in anger. That is, until the inevitable reunion & tour, the odd guest appearance & plethora of reality type columns for the gutter press. (Or not). Anyway, we are 4 games into the season & still not a sniff of a win for the mighty Rock CC. After the triumphant end of last season, hopes must have been high of a winning start to 2010. In summary, Rock were enthusiastic at Wooler, Short of manpower at home to Embleton, (9 men, gave them a fright though!), Brainless at home to Mitford and finally, utterly hopeless at Alnmouth. Of course, great credit must go to our opponents but they seldom had to slip out of first gear. There have been some notable exceptions to the norm but they have been too few & far between. When you can only score 111 on an absolute belter of a pitch, questions have to be asked; such as; Where is the fighting spirit? Why bother having practice on a Friday night if no-one turns up? Why doesn’t half of the squad answer the text messages they are sent every week? Why do we have to try & belt every ball out of the park? Who cares if Gareth Barry won’t make it to the World Cup?

Let’s try & answer a couple of those questions; Fighting Spirit is engendered by a sense of “team”, which in turn should result in a high level of mutual respect between the team members, something that is sadly lacking at Rock. Your captain on a Saturday is exactly that, he is there to be respected. If you don’t practice, (including myself), you won’t get any better; as Gary Player always says, “the more I practice, the luckier I get”. The system that Tony set up regarding availability via text message is a good one, practically foolproof, you might say. Common courtesy demands at least a reply. Speaking of The Pieman; he is a genius with a cricket bat in his gloveless hands, he can, on occasion, belt every ball out of the park. Unless you possess his natural ability & power, you have to graft for your runs like the rest of us mere mortals! Oh, and Gareth Barry couldn’t lace Paul Scholes’ boots.

Ah, well, I wanted to be all positive & feeling good about the future, encouraging my pals to greater feats of derring-do. Try this, then. You have all got the talent & tenacity to pull this round, make a difference, get us a win. We need to do what we did at the end of last season & work hard, the results will come. I believe!!

Right, then. Off to the land of King Arthur & 6-toed locals to scoff some cream teas & drink a little bit of cider! 2 wins & some good weather is all that I could wish for & see you all on Bank Holiday Monday at the polygon. I’ll leave you with these random thoughts: Vote for your local Sheriff, Pay for your own sweater for T20, Real Ale is a myth, it all tastes like gut-rot to me, Be nice to people; they are potential sponsors and finally, thank you for allowing me to whinge, whine, eulogise, fantasise and generally be a right miserable old bastard for the last 2 years. Honest, it’s been fun!!

The Calmster

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